There is a struggle in me in knowing conciously that I need to perceive rational reality rather then getting mixed up with subjective and emotionally-provoked thoughts, perceptions and assumption. Accepting what lays in front of the eye and keeping your mind from interpreting anything else beyond an action or attitude is hard. The latter is really hard. How can one stop oneself from relating thoughts with intuitively perceived contexts? What do you have in hand if all you feel is just warm air? I’m blindfolded and out on a search for something familiar, something to hold on. Blind and thirsty, walking forward and not knowing when I will reach the oasis and the comfort of home. So I try to shut down my thoughts and overplay them with good memories and the present’s entertaining and fulfilling moments..
I pamper myself with a lot of hope, hopes as high as a skytower, or even as high as a mountain. With full awareness that if it wasn’t to be fulfilling the hope I might fall into a hole, not knowing how deep it might be. But that’s alright, I take the stakes, for you will not to the safe harbour if you don’t take risks.
For now, I sail my boat in the mid of the sea, going where the wind takes me, but always towards the sun – that shows me the way home.
Viennita - From Vienna to Jakarta 